HJ

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Revolution-Nein's avatar
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Sometimes, I wish I could be of actual material help to my friends/the people I want to help. I wish I could do things to help people instead of just saying things like "Something will happen in the future and it will be okay" or giving them ill-thought out advice about relationships that aren't friendship or romantic. I have no idea what I could physically do. Maybe give them money if they need it, financially (this is an issue with some people I know). Or physically hang out with them somewhere if they need to be in the presence of someone nice. I just wish I had the opportunity.

Sometimes, I wish I weren't aromantic. I wish that because then it would give me the possibility of waking up in the morning, thinking, "What is the point of me doing anything today?" and then remembering that there's someone else in this universe who I can be with and enjoy and love and that this person is counting on me to love them, which is no problem because I love them right back. It's probably not as easy or nice or good as that. And I know that aromantics apparently have something that's like a romantic relationship but not entirely (if what they say on Tumblr or forums is any indicator). But I don't understand it, and I wouldn't know what to do in a relationship like that or why.

Sometimes, I wish I had more in the way of feelings so I could use it for my writing. I wrote the most when I experienced the deepest and most diverse feelings. Now I don't really feel anything much in particular. Most of it is sort of a neutral flatness, with ire over small things and excitement over even smaller ones. But not as bad as it sounds. It's not bad if you're trying to be a person. But maybe it's bad if you're trying to be a writer. Or an artist. I'm reading books and watching movies/shows to get an impression of how some emotions are treated in fiction because, otherwise, I won't know how to write them. The human brain - and this is apparently a scientific fact - is not "programmed", so to speak, to remember emotions. If you had very strong emotions in the past, you can't recall them like you can recall a memory of something that physically happened. And nothing's really happening to me now that I can turn into a story without making it a direct ripoff of what I'm going through now. Or while giving it a plot. Yeah.

Sometimes, I wish I had a time machine so, whenever I want to leave my current situations and go on an adventure for a while and come back five minutes later, I could. And I wish I had one so that I could go back in time and change a few things that I've done. Not big things. Just little ones, like saying something I wanted to say but originally decided not to, or saying hi to someone more than I used to because now I know I might not ever see them again, or not having a conversation with someone that maybe spoiled our relationship, just a little. I'm clever and I'd be able to do it without causing a time paradox.

These are, I suppose, some things I won't be able to do. I'm probably better off as I am anyway.
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Phlegmatizma's avatar
From my perspective, that's the brilliance of being human. Having to work out all the painful details. Having to fix things. No, having the ability to fix things.

I might have misunderstood a bit, but it seems that writing is a bit more the matter of quality and not amount. You have a different set of things to work with, a different set of tools. I guess it's a bit like giving somebody that only draws with a pen or pencil oil paints and tell them to be da Vinci. It ain't gonna happen. But they will get pretty good with oils.

As this is a bit of a late response, I hope that it's already fixed.

But on the subject of aromaticism... I'm not one to talk about romantic relationships because I haven't had that many, and the ones I had/have aren't as problematic as other peoples, even if they do have their glitches.

But I find that sometimes (and this isn't just me attempting to say something upbeat on the fact) that friends are better than lovers. Yes, I do admit that it's nice too wake up in the morning sometimes and realize that somebody out there loves you and you love them back. But, and this might be just me, it more pleasant to wake up and to realize that, once that one person leaves you (because it's never a matter of 'if', it's a matter of when), somebody will be there to pick up the pieces, to laugh, and to go grab a shotgun and camp outside that person's house. All my breakups have been relatively smooth (for me, anyways), but it seems to me that friends are just a bit nicer to have than lovers.

Then again, one is almost never happy with what they have, even if they worked damn hard to get it.

....
I should probably say that my opinion on all of these subjects are a bit biased in a strange way.